000			02118nam a2200169Ia 4500
008			160121s9999 xx 000 0 und d
020			_a9781400046003
082			_a658.405 _bPER
100			_aPerlow, Leslie A
245			_aWhen you say yes but mean no: how silencing conflict wrecks relationships and companies, and what you can do about it
260			_bCrown Business, _aNew York, _c2003.
300			_aix, 254 pages; 22 cm.
520			_a"We live in a culture -- especially at work -- that prefers harmony over discord, agreement over dissent, speed over deliberation. We often smile and nod to each other even though deep down we could not disagree more. Whether with colleagues, friends, or family members, the tendency to paper over differences rather than confront them is extremely common. We believe that the best thing to do to preserve our relationships and to ensure that our work gets done as expeditiously as possible is to silence conflict. Let's face it, most bosses don't encourage us to share our differences. Indeed, many people are taught that loyal employees accept corporate values, policies, and decisions -- never challenging or questioning them. If we want to hold on to our jobs and move up in our organizations, stifling conflict is the safest way to do it -- or so we believe. And it is not just with our bosses that we fear raising a dissenting opinion. We worry about what our peers and even our subordinates may think of us. We don't want to embarrass ourselves or create a bad impression. We don't want to lose others' respect or risk rejection. We often associate conflict with its negative form -- petty bickering, heated arguing, a bloody fight. But conflict can also be a source of creative energy; when handled constructively by both parties, differences can lead to a healthy and fruitful collaboration, creation, or construction of new knowledge or solutions. When we silence conflict, we avoid the possibility of negative conflict, but we also miss the potential for constructive conflict."
650			_aConflict management
650			_aManagement
942			_2ddc _cB
999			_c565048 _d565048